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Thursday, March 28

The Full Moon Talking

The Full Moon and other Nonsense
Ten Things Thursday:

1.       When I was in “Astronomy 101” in college, we had to do a research paper on the astronomical topic of our choice. I chose to do my paper on The Full Moon Effect. You know, where everyone goes apeshit every 28 days. If a computer with a disk drive still existed I could pull that assignment up and confirm why everyone is acting so fucked-up this week. It would also require me to find those damn disks somewhere under my bed in a wheeled plastic storage container. Instead I’ll just say that I’ve noticed some crazy shit go down in the past couple of days. Be aware, its real folks. (But not a werewolf….ba dum chink)

2.       This week the kids and I have been on Spring Break. This is about the time I am REALLY glad that I got that teaching degree. Say what you will. Best. Career. Ever.

3.       I didn’t lose a goddamned pound this week. That seems to be a popular trend on my online forum at; we are separated in forums by banding month. All the other March Bandsters are complaining of the same thing…still on our mashie and air molecule diet and the scale is frozen in time. There are a few ways to reconcile this.

4.      Bought a new scale this week on Amazon. ( First I googled “most accurate home bathroom scale” and was brought to a page from Good Housekeeping magazine where the institute did one of those research trials. The best scale is from a company called Eat Smart and was about 30 bucks. Out with the old, in with the new!

5.      Or it could be my diet. I did cheat and eat one cheese-it, three fries, five club crackers, and one Junior Mint this week. I know, all of those decadent items add up to about 31 calories, but I can’t help but feel guilty. In retrospect, cheating on a diet used to mean eating a secret snickers bar in the car when you said you were just running out for milk. Now it’s hiding one crunchy Cheeto under my damn tongue until it dissolves enough for me to swallow it.

6.       Most likely my problem is that my body is saying, “Hey! I noticed that you have been on a 650 calorie a day diet for six weeks! Congrats! Since this must be the new trend we’ll just go with it and say it’s normal!” Kidding, my body doesn’t talk. But realistically, my metabolism is trying to find its way amongst the paranormal activity which now resides inside.

7.       But no joke, food is always on my body’s mind. Currently, I am trying to pretend I don’t notice my son making a design with liquid cheese on a cracker. Okay, so maybe it’s not cheese. Who cares about that, that shit is tasty.

8.       Went to my support group meeting like a good girl on Monday and it was a pretty positive. I really like the nutritionist leader, and there are some other ladies in there that seem to be a good time. You know, ladies I would like to go get a beer with. But won’t, because we just had weight loss surgery for Christ’s sake. Camaraderie is very important though, I have always thought that there is something to say about being with people who are LIKE YOU. So hopefully group will continue to go well, and we can learn from each other, and maybe go out for a diet, decaffeinated iced-tea together someday as friends.

9.       And speaking of my friends, they are amazing. I was able to hang out with some really good friends while home this week and am always reminded of how lucky I am to have some wonderful women in my life.  Everyone is from different walks of life but we all share the same understanding and caring for each other. One of life’s blessings is girlfriends  =)

10.   ENJOY YOUR EASTER!!! HALLELUIA, HE IS RISEN! (Read #10 on Sunday.)
                   10.a. (The full moon got me.)

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