So after a long summer of proving to myself that I can maintain my weight on my own….I have decided to make friends again with MyFitnessPal App. I stopped tracking in June….survived Disney with all their anti-christ Mickey shaped snack food and lived to tell about it, had some other diet and exercise road blocks while having to lay low, and now it’s September and the scale hasn’t budged. Which is a good thing, don’t get me wrong. I’m happy that I cracked the code to just being “me”. But I am also realizing I’m just not…quite…there.
I feel great. I am told I look great. Hell, I just bought my FIRST EVER tight ass body con dress for an upcoming wedding. But I am STILL obese and that bugs the shit out of me like no tomorrow. I am okay with being BMI chart diagnosed overweight. Overweight means curvy, and yes can even mean healthy. My doctor’s team has assured me that even professional athletes can struggle to get a “normal BMI” since the charts don’t account for anything but height and weight. That being “overweight BMI” might be what’s healthy for me if I’m eating right and exercising. And especially for a lap-band patient, the overweight range is statistically unattainable for most.
But it IS attainable for me. And I am less than 10 lbs away.
So here is my plan:
Put myself back behind the steering wheel. Remember that the more I eat right and exercise the more EVERYTHING around me goes more smoothly. Remember that putting myself first (eeek!) is really in a crazy way putting everyone around me first. I need to get back to tracking what I am eating. I need to get back to snacking in moderation and not letting a bag of chips be my dinner. I need to get off my ass and start walking my 5K every night again even if I can’t run just quite yet. To start blogging twice a week again, because it keeps me motivated and motivates others, and reminds me why the fuck I’m here in the first place.
I AM NOT THERE. I AM HERE.
Why is it so easy to see the finish line and stop to tie your shoe only to forget you haven’t finished the race yet?
I know, super philosophical and metaphorical of me.